How are we related again?

Last night, watching Calamity Jane -
Srah: I'll break this bottle of sasparilly over your head.
Me: Um, that's Snapple.

Last Wednesday, June 25th -
Me: At one point, our wipe-off board said "Welcome to the room of people who will never vote for Joel for political office unless he is running against Geoffrey Feiger or Satan."
Daddy: What do you have against Satan?