NOIBLATA

"Tadpoles! Tadpoles is a winner!"

2009-02-05T08:00:00.001-05:00

The winner of my Presidential trivia quiz is...........

With a hijillion bonus points.......

Elisabeth!

Presidential Trivia Quiz

2009-01-20T19:01:00.017-05:00

In honor of today's inauguration, or perhaps because I needed blog fodder and I am a fan of presidential history and trivia in general, I bring you my first ever (and probably last ever), Presidential Trivia Quiz.

~~Which U.S. President is tied with Thomas Jefferson for being the third tallest all-time?~~ Bill Clinton (Srah)
~~Which U.S. President approved "Seward's Folly"?~~ Andrew Johnson (Elisabeth)
~~Which U.S. President used to bathe naked in the Potomac?~~ John Quincy Adams (Aunt Pam)
~~Which U.S. President attended Miami University?~~ Benjamin Harrison (Aunt Pam)
~~Which U.S. President was the only one unanimously elected to the office by the Electoral College?~~ George Washington (Aunt Pam)
~~Which U.S. President had the shortest retirement between leaving office and death?~~ James Polk (Elisabeth)
~~Which U.S. President ranks as ninth tallest all-time?~~ Barack Obama (Srah)
~~Which U.S. President was the first to have a beard?~~ Abraham Lincoln (Srah)
Which U.S. President holds the record for the most grandchildren and great-grandchildren of all of the U.S. Presidents?
~~Which U.S. President signed the order that awarded the posthumous title of "General of the Armies of the United States" on George Washington?~~ Gerald R. Ford Jr. (Srah)
~~Which U.S. President was the first to visit Alaska (not necessarily the state)?~~ Warren G. Harding (Aunt Pam)
~~Which U.S. President had a Vice-President who killed a man while in office?~~ Thomas Jefferson (Srah)
~~Which U.S. President was in China during the Boxer Rebellion?~~ Herbert Hoover (Srah)
~~Which U.S. President served on the Board of Trustees of the Ohio State University after his presidency, until his death?~~ Rutherford B. Hayes (Srah)
~~Which U.S. President was born in New Jersey?~~ Grover Cleveland (Aunt Pam)
~~Which U.S. President predicted that history would vindicate him, even though it has not to date?~~ James Buchanan (Gary)
~~Which U.S. President was the first President to be born in the twentieth century (in order of election, later Presidents may have been older)?~~ John F. Kennedy (Srah)
~~Which U.S. President is known for this statement: "I have only two regrets: I didn't shoot Henry Clay and I didn't hang John C. Calhoun."?~~ Andrew Jackson (Elisabeth)
~~Which U.S. President did Harriet Beecher Stowe refer to as "the arch traitor"?~~ Franklin Pierce (Aunt Pam)
~~Which U.S. President played in the first College World Series?~~ George H.W. Bush (Srah)
~~Which U.S. President served as a defense attorney for the British soldiers involved in the Boston Massacre?~~ John Adams (Aunt Pam)
~~Which U.S. President gave up alcohol in 1986?~~ George W. Bush (Aunt Pam)
~~Which U.S. President is the only one to have held the office of President Pro Tempore of the Senate?~~ John Tyler (Elisabeth)
~~Which U.S. President was given the oath of office by his father?~~ Calvin Coolidge (Elisabeth)
~~Which U.S. President's memoirs, written while terminally ill and completed days before his death, earned the family over $450,000 at a time that the family was bankrupt?~~ Ulysses S. Grant (Aunt Pam)
~~Which U.S. President served under Rutherford Hayes during the Civil War?~~ William McKinley (Elisabeth)
~~Which U.S. President is the only one whose first language was not English?~~ Martin Van Buren (Srah)
~~Which U.S. President is considered the "Father of the Constitution"?~~ James Madison (Aunt Pam)
~~Which U.S. President used to do radio broadcasts of Iowa Hawkeye home football games?~~ Ronald Reagan (Srah)
~~Which U.S. President was the first to travel in an airplane on official business?~~ Franklin D. Roosevelt (Aunt Pam)
~~Which U.S. President has a capital of a foreign nation named after him?~~ James Monroe (Srah)
~~Which U.S. President signed the Medicare bill and gave the first two Medicare cards to Harry and Bess Truman?~~ Lyndon B. Johnson (Aunt Pam)
~~Which U.S. President served the nation in the highest office of both the executive and judicial branches of the federal government?~~ William Howard Taft (Aunt Pam)
~~Which U.S. President was "attacked" by a swimming rabbit?~~ Jimmy Carter (Aunt Pam)
~~Which U.S. President, at the time of his election, was a U.S. Representative, the only sitting member of the U.S. House of Representatives to be elected?~~ James Garfield (Aunt Pam)
~~Which U.S. President was exempt from military service due to his religion, but joined anyway and became a lieutenant commander in the U.S. Navy?~~ Richard M. Nixon (Srah)
~~Which U.S. President had a child that married a person who would later become the leader of a new government?~~ Zachary Taylor (Srah)
~~Which U.S. President was the first to travel outside the United States during his presidency?~~ Theodore Roosevelt (Srah)
~~Which U.S. President is the only President other than Grant to have achieved the rank of a five-star general, or General of the Army?~~ Dwight David Eisenhower (Aunt Pam)
~~Which U.S. President signed the Fugitive Slave Act?~~ Millard Fillmore (Elisabeth)
~~Which U.S. President was the first to attend the World Series?~~ Woodrow Wilson (Elisabeth)
~~Which U.S. President was rumored to have been born in Canada, and would have therefore been ineligible for the office?~~ Chester Alan Arthur (Aunt Pam)
~~Which U.S. President worked as a haberdasher before entering politics?~~ Harry S. Truman (Aunt Pam)

~~Extra Credit (+5): Which U.S. President appears as the desktop on my computer?~~ Gerald R. Ford, Jr. (Aunt Pam)
Extra Extra Credit (+10): Give me a link to my desktop image.

If you have physically seen my desktop, used my computer, etc., you are ineligible for the extra credit.

Aunt Pam - 17 + 5EC = 22
Srah - 15 + 1BP = 16
Elisabeth - 8 + 1BP = 9
Gary - 1

I am a big nerd

2009-01-15T11:09:00.002-05:00

Presidential Portraits

Score: 100% (10 out of 10)

I know The Simpsons!

2009-01-15T11:09:00.001-05:00

The Simpsons Softball Quiz

Score: 100% (9 out of 9)

Movie Quotes Meme

2008-12-19T15:00:00.003-05:00

Via Dan and Srah and reposted from Facebook

1. Pick 15 of your favorite movies.
2. Go to IMDb and find a quote from each movie.
3. Post them here for everyone to guess.
4. Strike it out when someone guesses correctly, and put who guessed it and the movie.
5. NO GOOGLING/using IMDb search or other search functions

~~1. "Last night, I counted five thousand sheep in those three beds, so I had to have another bed to sleep in. You wouldn't want me to sleep with the sheep, would you?"~~ A Night at the Opera, guessed by Srah

~~2. "He is not Judge Judy and Executioner!"~~ Hot Fuzz, guessed by Srah

~~3. "Tea can do many things, Jane, but it can't bring back the dead."~~ Death at a Funeral, guessed by Srah

~~4. "You blew the best thing you had going for you. You blew the element of surprise."~~ The Italian Job, guessed by Jess

~~5. "Nobody messes with a dwarf in a red raincoat."~~ Unconditional Love, guessed by my Mom

~~6. "Indeed it is. I encourage him to be in his garden as often as possible."~~ Pride & Prejudice, guessed by Srah

7. "Oh, the English, and their STUPID sense of fair play!"

8. "Oh! It was the killer! I saw him... he was... horrible. He was a tall guy... short too. And he was wearing this really nice suit, though it was kinda shabby. And he, and he had blackish, brownish, reddish, blondish, kinda whitish hair. And, and he definitely went downstairs, or, or maybe it was up."

~~9. "Come on! If you don't drink your fatty drinks, you'll never really achieve quality cellulite."~~ Sliding Doors, guessed by Srah

~~10. "For 90% of a given day, you're adjustin' your bollocks... scratchin' your bollocks... or otherwise playin' with your bollocks!"~~ The Closer You Get/American Women, guessed by Srah

~~11. "Well, nobody's perfect."~~ Some Like It Hot, guessed by Srah

12. "No. If you were your father, I doubt very much if I would have kissed you."

~~13. "If you fit into my pants I will kill myself."~~ While You Were Sleeping, guessed by Srah

~~14. "Right, I'm regular, I am a regular man. I want... but that's not the point! The point is, who are YOU? WHO ARE YOU?"~~ A Life Less Ordinary, guessed by Srah

15. "Croup. Of the croup, she died, leaving me and my mentally ill brother, 'ere, to fend for ourselves. Murdered, she was, in 'er bed by one of 'er johns. Y'see, sir, she sold 'erself to feed us. She compromised 'erself for oursakes, leaving us all alone and 'ungry and 'omeless and my poor brother needs a brain operation and my glaucoma's gettin' worse and sir... SIR!... SIR? I can't see you sir! I can't see you sir! AHH... AHH... I'M BLIND!... AHHHHHHH!" The Impostors, guessed by Srah

Revealed

2008-12-18T23:45:00.003-05:00

I may be trying out for a role in The Pirates of Penzance next semester. This started me thinking about other plays/musicals/operettas that I would love to be in. Sorry for another list, but feel free to comment suggestions.

Pirates of Penzance
The Music Man
The Scarlet Pimpernel
Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat
Jesus Christ Superstar
Annie Get Your Gun
My Fair Lady
Gigi
The Sound of Music
South Pacific
Brigadoon

Layout

2008-12-17T11:47:00.005-05:00

I'm thinking of changing the layout. I've had this layout since Shrek 2 came out. That was in 2004, apparently. I have to look through the templates and see if there is one I prefer or if I want to use my awesome web design abilities to fix something up.

My progress on the AFI's (orginal) list of the Greatest 100 American films

2008-12-15T13:07:00.003-05:00

I chose to use the list from 1998 because it didn't have Titanic on it.

Citizen Kane
Casablanca
The Godfather
Gone with the Wind
Lawrence of Arabia
The Wizard of Oz
The Graduate
On the Waterfront
Schindler's List
Singin' in the Rain
It's a Wonderful Life
Sunset Boulevard
The Bridge on the River Kwai
Some Like It Hot
Star Wars
All About Eve
The African Queen
Psycho
Chinatown
One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest
The Grapes of Wrath
2001: A Space Odyssey
The Maltese Falcon
Raging Bull
E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial
Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb
Bonnie and Clyde
Apocalypse Now
Mr. Smith Goes to Washington
The Treasure of the Sierra Madre
Annie Hall
The Godfather Part II
High Noon
To Kill a Mockingbird
It Happened One Night
Midnight Cowboy
The Best Years of Our Lives
Double Indemnity
Doctor Zhivago
North by Northwest
West Side Story
Rear Window
King Kong
The Birth of a Nation
A Streetcar Named Desire
A Clockwork Orange
Taxi Driver
Jaws
Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs
Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid
The Philadelphia Story
From Here to Eternity
Amadeus
All Quiet on the Western Front
The Sound of Music
M*A*S*H
The Third Man
Fantasia
Rebel Without a Cause
Raiders of the Lost Ark
Vertigo
Tootsie
Stagecoach
Close Encounters of the Third Kind
The Silence of the Lambs
Network
The Manchurian Candidate
An American in Paris
Shane
The French Connection
Forrest Gump
Ben-Hur
Wuthering Heights
The Gold Rush
Dances with Wolves
City Lights
American Graffiti
Rocky
The Deer Hunter
The Wild Bunch
Modern Times
Giant
Platoon
Fargo
Duck Soup
Mutiny on the Bounty
Frankenstein
Easy Rider
Patton
The Jazz Singer
My Fair Lady
A Place in the Sun
The Apartment
Goodfellas
Pulp Fiction
The Searchers
Bringing Up Baby
Unforgiven
Guess Who's Coming to Dinner
Yankee Doodle Dandy

Seen, but saw a long time ago so don't remember
Saw an edited version, please can I just leave it at that?
Watched

I don't know if I'll ever complete this list because there are a lot of movies on here that I have no interest in watching *cough* Shane *cough* The Grapes of Wrath *cough*.

What's that? I disappeared for months?

2008-12-13T19:24:00.008-05:00

I'm trying to get into the Christmas spirit by watching Christmas movies, so I'm trying to make a list of all the movies to watch before the day (in no order, other than the order I think of them in).

The Muppet Christmas Carol (Michael Caine! Muppets!)
Elf
The Polar Express
Christmas in Connecticut (Mmmmmm, Dennis Morgan)
White Christmas (Danny Kaye! Dean Jagger is adorable! Mary Wickes! Dancing!)
Die Hard
Die Hard 2: Die Harder
A Blackadder Christmas Carol
Miracle on 34th Street
In the Good Old Summertime (I'm really sorry I thought you died thirty years ago, Van Johnson!)
Love Actually
Holiday Inn
While You Were Sleeping
The Best Christmas Pageant Ever
A Christmas Story (Blergh)
Scrooge
A Christmas Carol
Annie
The Bells of St. Mary
Going My Way
National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation (Clearly this was intended as a joke, because Chevy Chase sucks.)
The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe
It's A Wonderful Life
The Man Who Came to Dinner (A fellow alum again! Penguins!)
Scrooged
Home Alone
Prancer (I've never heard of this.)
Bridget Jones's Diary
Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason

Feel free to comment your suggestions.

Happy Birthday!

2008-05-22T10:52:00.001-04:00

Happy would-have-been 101st birthday to you!

Wheeee!

2008-05-22T00:19:00.002-04:00

I'm getting a book!

Since pretty much only people who know me read this anyway....

2008-01-15T16:43:00.001-05:00

My best friend's older sister just had a baby at the end of November, so my mom and I made a quilt and an afghan for her baby girl. Since most of the people who read this saw the work in progress, here are the finished projects, which have been in my camera since December.

Guess what I'm learning!

2008-01-15T16:40:00.000-05:00

Worst. Thieves. Ever.

2008-01-13T12:21:00.000-05:00

I hadn't posted this before, but about a week ago, our car was robbed. We are bothered by the theft, but most people probably wouldn't have laughed as much as we have about the theft. The car was left intact, my parents think they might have forgotten to lock the doors, but they did fiddle with our belongings.

As far as we can tell, this is what the thieves got away with:

A couple of bluegrass CDs
An opera CD
A few musical soundtracks
A free CD we got from the Michigan Marching Band
An empty CD jewel case for a PDQ Bach CD (which was in the CD player and therefore unstolen)
A free calculator which doesn't display the final number

Apparently this wasn't the first time that our family has shown itself to be the worst targets for thieves. Dad said that when he was in college he got mugged; the thieves stole his wallet, which contained his school ID and driver's license, but no cash or credit cards. They didn't even get the eighteen cents he had in his pockets.

So basically, what I'm trying to say is:

Hey potential thieves,

You probably shouldn't try to steal from us because we don't really have anything worth stealing. In all likelihood, you'll just get some crap that you won't be able to sell.

One of the weirdest questions ever

2008-01-13T10:58:00.000-05:00

Please answer:

Who do you find more attractive:

Barbara Stanwyck or Greta Garbo?
James Stewart or Cary Grant?

Thoughts to keep in mind - The Philadelphia Story, It's a Wonderful Life, etc.

Paul Newman or Robert Redford?

Ttkim - The Sting

Jessica Simpson or Jessica Alba (thanks, hockey team, for providing this one)?

Ttkim - Chicken of the Sea

90s Tom Cruise or 90s Brad Pitt?
Modern Tom Cruise or Modern Brad Pitt?
Eli Manning or Peyton Manning?
Brett Favre or Tom Brady or Steve Young or Joe Montana or Drew Brees or any other current or former NFL quarterback? Or other player of some other position?

Ttkim - Amusing movie cameos or commercials, unrelated to soup

Steve Yzerman or Nicklas Lidstrom?

Ttkim - Red Wings captains, yay!

Sergei Fedorov or Enrique Iglesias?

Ttkim - Anna Kournikova

Any other suggestions?

I don't even want to think about the search results I'll get for this

2008-01-07T00:21:00.000-05:00

I think the most disturbing (for me at least) part of the Capital One Bowl was after the game, in the locker room, when the players danced around Lloyd Carr chanting "Lloyd, take your clothes off. Lloyd, get naked."

I thought I imagined this, but apparently it was quite real.

Also, shut up, Rob Parker. I'm sick of your ability to find the negative in anything. Whereas most people seem happy about Lloyd Carr's victory in his final game, you choose to whine about underachieving. :P

Whoops again

2008-01-04T15:05:00.000-05:00

Apparently I have forgotten my blogiversary (again). Happy 6th birthday (plus 2 days), blog!

More genius from ESPN's boy

2008-01-02T10:17:00.000-05:00

"There's a reason Lloyd Carr is being replaced."

Oh really? Because I thought when people retired, no one took their jobs. I am so confused by the way the world works.

*cries*

Hey Idiot,

I'm so sick of you and everyone else in the media and at other schools getting this wrong. Lloyd Carr was not fired. The Athletic Department had no intention of firing him - if anything, they wanted him to stick around, but he said no. He did not retire under pressure from the Athletic Department because they were disgusted by the results of the Appalachian State*, Oregon, Wisconsin and Ohio State games. He retired because he felt it was the best thing for himself and the school if he retired.

That said, I hate you,

Alfie

* The best part of this game (which I was at) was that the ASU cheerleaders were directly in front of my section, so I had a great view of the portion of the game where they were holding up signs to spell out A-S-U. Why was this so great? Because at one point, one of the cheerleaders got mixed up and was in the wrong place, so instead of spelling A-S-U, she made the signs spell out A-S-S.

Once again

2008-01-01T17:02:00.000-05:00

Heisman Trophy winners don't seem to fare well in bowl games.

Thank you for everything:

Chad Henne
Mike Hart
Jake Long
Lloyd Carr
and everyone else

I think there's some bias here....

2008-01-01T15:16:00.000-05:00

I'm watching the Capital One Bowl between Michigan and Florida. It's currently halftime and they've shown clips of both bands playing one song of their halftime show.

They showed Michigan playing this.
They showed Florida playing a song by the Beatles.

Also, was that man lipsynching to Cab Calloway singing "Minnie the Moocher" or does he just kind of sound like CC? If it's the former, why?

Capital One Bowl

2008-01-01T13:29:00.000-05:00

My older sister is a dork that didn't realize that she WAS wearing a Michigan shirt.

Weeeeeeee!

2007-12-20T09:23:00.000-05:00

Michigan has a head coach for the football team. I have formed no real opinion about him other than that I'm glad there is one because it means I can stop throwing things at my radio.

Michigan

2007-12-13T08:21:00.000-05:00

Dear all media,

Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease shut up about the Michigan coaching search. It's getting to the point where I hear my favorite college team mentioned on the radio and stop listening. I only read the back page of the sports section of the newspaper (prep sports) because the rest of the newspaper seems to be about the Michigan football search.
Also, please shut up about Les Miles. He keeps saying he doesn't want to come here. I don't want him to come here. I keep hearing people threaten to give up their season tickets if he doesn't come here. GREAT! More for me.
It's gotten to the point where I don't know who to cheer for in the National Championship. The Rival or the Coach Who Won't Shut Up About How He's Not Interested In The Michigan Coaching Job.

Someone wake me up when college hockey starts back up,

Alfie

Haha

2007-12-08T23:22:00.000-05:00

Things that make me laugh:

- Sarah hearing a song and starting to dance, only to discover that it was a Viagra commercial.

A day of football and hockey results in.....

2007-11-19T00:59:00.000-05:00

Hi! I have little to no voice! Go me!

I are smart

2007-11-13T16:06:00.001-05:00

Get a Cash Advance

Musicals Quiz VII

2007-11-02T22:06:00.000-04:00

It's back! The rules are pretty much the same as usual. Song title and musical in the comments, if you provide the character that sings the line, you get imaginary bonus points. Hurray for imaginary bonus points!

*1. "When the world is saying not to, by God, you know you've got to march on, boys."
(Percy & his men, "Into the Fire," The Scarlet Pimpernel)
[+3 for mommy]
*2. "....Where the rose and the jasmine mingle...."
(The Caliph, "Night of My Nights," Kismet)
[+2 for srah, +1 for mommy]
*3. "You can have all you ever wanted...."
(Galinda/Glinda, "Defying Gravity," Wicked)
[+3 for srah]
4. "If my heart could beat, it would break my chest...."
(Spike, "Rest in Peace," Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Once More, With Feeling)
[+5 for Amy]
5. "And in no time, you'll be singing 'Home, Sweet Home....'"
(___________, "Bon Voyage," Anything Goes)
[+2 for Aunt Pam]
6. "Oh, we knew we could lose...."
7. "I see a light inside."
(Frederic, "Hush, Hush! Not a Word," The Pirates of Penzance)
[+2 for srah, +1 for mommy]
8. "Life is thrilling as can be...."
(Uncle Honoré, "It's a Bore," Gigi)
[+5 for srah]
9. "Whenever I'm, from time to time, depressed...."
(_____________, "Those Were The Good Old Days," Damn Yankees)
[+2 for Aunt Pam]
10. "Move them feet...."
(Miss Hannigan, Rooster and Lily St. Regis, "Easy Street," Annie)
[+5 for mommy]
11. "I do all the good I can...."
12. "My purse has yet to know a silver lining...."
(Bill Calhoun as Lucentio, "Tom, Dick or Harry," Kiss Me Kate)
[+1 for Aunt Pam, +2 for srah]
13. "Now through the smoke, she calls to me, to make my way across the flames...."
(Buffy, "Walk Through the Fire," Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Once More, With Feeling)
[+5 for Amy]
14. "Say that it is and you're dead!"
(Tommy Keeler and Winnie Tate, "Who Do You Love, I Hope," Annie Get Your Gun)
[+5 for Elisabeth]
15. "....Now everything is you...."
*16. "I'm getting tired of this masquerade...."
(Rochester/Gypsy, "The Gypsy," Jane Eyre)
[+3 for Aunt Pam]

*****BONUS*****
The trick for the bonus is that each of these songs is from a musical that is also located in the main section. Two of these songs are from the same musical as one of the above. One of these is even from the same song....can you figure it out?

- "I believed I had a choice till the music in her voice turned my whole world around...."
(Percy, "She Was There," The Scarlet Pimpernel)
[+5 for mommy]
- "Don't you see, can't you feel it?"
(___________, "I Do, I Do, I Do," Mamma Mia!)
[+2 for srah]
- "I've got the question, I've had it for days...."
- "I'm good by day and I'm good by night...."
(Reno, "Blow, Gabriel, Blow," Anything Goes)
[+5 for Amy]
- "Won't somebody help me chase the shadows away?"
- "For your foes are fierce and ruthless...."
(Major Stanley's Daughters, "When the Foeman Bares his Steel," The Pirates of Penzance)
[+5 for mommy]

UPDATE: I just realized this, but #4 and #13 are from the same musical. Have fun!

UPDATE: Scoring as it stands:

mommy - 20
srah - 16
Amy - 15
Aunt Pam - 8
Elisabeth - 5

I'm color-coding for my own organizational purposes, if you feel that you should be represented by another color, tell me which in the comments....

UPDATE #3: The ones that are only worth 3 points even if you do provide all the information (because this is the first quiz they've been on, only the ones that people have failed to get on previous quizzes are now worth 5 points) now have asterisks in front of them - there are only four.

Still not dead

2007-10-31T23:35:00.000-04:00

I will be blogging something here soon, but I've been kind of preoccupied with work and classes.

Now alphabetically

2007-08-28T23:18:00.000-04:00

2m 0s

Click here to try the quiz.

I chopped over a minute and a quarter off my time.

Sad

2007-08-28T22:59:00.001-04:00

3m 18s

Click here to try the quiz.

The truly sad thing is that I totally could have done this faster if I'd done them in alphabetical order rather than working my way around the outer border of the United States, then filling in the states from west to east.

I think this goes with the ability to name all of the U.S. Presidents and English monarchs since 1066 on the list of nerdy things I can do.

Happy Belated Birthday!

2007-08-01T10:09:00.001-04:00

Happy Belated 27th Birthday to my favorite Harry Potter character, Neville Longbottom (7.30)!

Happy Belated Birthday to me!

2007-08-01T10:07:00.001-04:00

Happy Belated Birthday (7.28) to me!
I am twenty-three!
I spent my birthday at a wedding!
So I couldn't blog to thee!

Hey, look! It's broken. And frozen. And wet.

2007-07-03T09:41:00.001-04:00

I hate certain package delivery companies. One of these is a new hatred.

Dear FedEx,

Would it kill you to ring the bell when you deliver a package? I only seem to notice when I walk past and see the big FedEx truck. Otherwise, the box stays outside until the newspaper gets picked up.

Try harder,

Alfie

Now I have a new package enemy:

Dear DHL,

I knew I was getting a package today, so when I saw the DHL truck, I knew I'd hear the doorbell any minute. What I did not expect was to see your delivery man ignore the front door where the bell was to walk around to the back gate of my house and toss the package from the gate on to the back porch. Way to go!

Planning to send all packages through UPS or the USPS,

Alfie

Why?

2007-06-25T00:03:00.001-04:00

For some reason, my television is currently showing an episode of American Idol from Season 1. Brian Dunkelman - heehee! Ryan Seacrest is very unevenly tanned and bleached. He is also wearing ugly striped pants. Thank goodness for all of the suits he wears now.

Mothers and Daughters, or why I should not watch AFI Lists

2007-06-22T21:10:00.002-04:00

Ingrid Bergman and her daughter have very similar voices, which makes it disturbingly easy to picture Ingrid Bergman saying "Damn you, Johnny, you know I love my Big Beef and Cheddar."

Mom's scared because I pointed that out to her.

Lorne Michael's Sandwich Shop

2007-06-22T21:08:00.001-04:00

Once upon a time, I decided, for some insane reason, to watch 30 Rock from Episode 1, all the way through Season 1. Combining my knowledge of this show with several of the episodes of Saturday Night Live of the past season, I have come to the conclusion that Lorne Michaels owns a turkey sandwich shop and a lot of stock in Snapple.

Here are links to two episodes of 30 Rock in which Snapple and turkey sandwiches make important appearances.

And here are some examples from SNL:

Videos are thanks to NBC.com and NBC on YouTube.

UPDATE: Oh God. I found another one.

Adventure from work (a wee bit belated)

2007-06-22T21:02:00.001-04:00

Teenager: Oh man, I love that show. Dr. Mark Sloan is soooo hot.
Co-worker and I (simultaneously): Dick Van Dyke????????
Me: You watch Diagnosis: Murder too, huh?

Happy Birthday!

2007-06-22T20:52:00.000-04:00

Happy Birthday to ThatGirl, who is 27 today!

Strikes me as interesting....

2007-06-22T20:50:00.000-04:00

Tonight, the Detroit Tigers are playing the Atlanta Braves. Pitching for Detroit? Kenny Rogers of Savannah, Georgia. Pitching for Atlanta? John Smoltz of Warren, Michigan.

I just think that's kind of cool.

UPDATE: Strikes. Oh jeez. That title was not even an intentional pun.

Stanley Cup Finals 2007

2007-05-25T20:32:00.000-04:00

I had already decided that I would cheer for the Ottawa Senators in the Stanley Cup Finals, but after realizing that if Anaheim won, Chris Pronger would be allowed to lift it, a vision which has recently begun to give me nightmares, I have thrown myself even more thoroughly behind Ottawa.

Let's keep his sleazy hands off the Cup!

This is now old news, but I kept forgetting to write it.

2007-05-23T20:27:00.000-04:00

I'm excited because one of my favorite athletes was named to the College Baseball Hall of Fame.

"Liveblogging" American Idol

2007-05-22T20:00:00.000-04:00

8:00 - I like the fact that Ryan Seacrest seems to have one color of hair this year. Much better.
8:01 - He kind of has beady little eyes. It fascinates me.
8:02 - SCARY PAULA FACE!
8:03 - What happened to Brian Dunkelman? Why does this episode need to be two hours long? Oh, so we can see crappy auditions AGAIN.
8:04 - I don't like Jordin.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #1)

Blake Lewis singing "You Give Love A Bad Name"

8:11 - Hey, I got the title right this time. Is his hair purple or is that the lighting?
8:12 - I hope he's wearing plaid socks.

Sarah (8:11:09 PM): songwriter competition = LAMEZ

Sarah (8:11:17 PM): i wonder what jordin will sing

Sarah (8:11:23 PM): maybe that song she already sang eight times

Sarah (8:11:32 PM): he should have done time of the season

Sarah (8:11:35 PM): that's my favorite

Sarah (8:11:40 PM): i think repeating is dumb

Sarah (8:11:47 PM): i want blond blake back

Sarah (8:11:53 PM): i wonder what his natural hair color is

Sarah (8:12:01 PM): his eyebrows aren't very dark

Sarah (8:12:13 PM): what is that dance?

Sarah (8:12:30 PM): it's like he's marching in place, crotch-first

Sarah (8:12:47 PM): i love his little duet with the drummer

8:13 - UGLY COAT ON RANDY!
8:15 - The lights make Blake happy! Pure joy upon his face!

Jordin Sparks singing "Fighter"

8:16 - I've heard at least one painfully bad note and she just started! Boo Jordin!

Sarah (8:16:38 PM): she's not performing

Sarah (8:16:41 PM): she's just standing there

8:17 - Jordin has CRAZY EYES!
8:18 - Robin thinks that Randy is wearing that jacket to distract from Paula's nose.
8:19 - Simon gives the first round to Blake, Paula to Jordin, and Randy is annoyingly indecisive.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #2)

Blake Lewis singing "She Will Loved"

8:25 - Yay plaid!

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #3)

Jordin Sparks singing "Broken Wing"

8:35 - Still don't like Jordin.
8:36 - That outfit is FABULOUS!

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #4)

8:41 - NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! It's the original song. "This Is My Now?" Whatever.

Blake Lewis singing "This Is My Now"

Sarah (8:41:58 PM): this is going to SUCK SO BAD

Sarah (8:42:01 PM): i am throwing up already

Sarah (8:42:06 PM): yay vest

Sarah (8:42:09 PM): boo tie

Sarah (8:42:12 PM): boo glitter

Sarah (8:42:14 PM): boo slow song

Sarah (8:42:17 PM): boo sitting

Sarah (8:42:23 PM): boo madeup sucky american idol song
Sarah (8:42:44 PM): ha ha glitter vest

Sarah (8:42:50 PM): i liked it until i saw the glitter
Sarah (8:43:31 PM): this song is bad

Sarah (8:43:38 PM): what happened in the middle there?

Sarah (8:43:45 PM): was he off, or was it the backup singers?
Sarah (8:43:53 PM): it's hard to know what note is the right one

Sarah (8:43:58 PM): since it's a made up song
Sarah (8:44:52 PM): i bet he's not going to be on AI next week
Sarah (8:44:55 PM): he's going home
Sarah (8:45:36 PM): paula: you're a great horse. chow mein! when do we get the knitting needles?
Sarah (8:45:46 PM): paula: fleebledeeboo!
Sarah (8:46:10 PM): stop laughing

Sarah (8:46:17 PM): or i will not be in love with you anymore

Sarah (8:46:19 PM): weirdo
Sarah (8:46:27 PM): bring back the blond hair

Sarah (8:46:30 PM): get rid of the glitter

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #5)

8:50 - Oh. One hour tonight. Two tomorrow.

Jordin Sparks singing "This Is My Now"

8:51 - Oh my god! Is Jordin seventeen? I'd forgotten.
8:53 - Phil looks like a bald little kid dressed in a sailor suit.

Sarah (8:52:44 PM): for a lame song like this you need someone who has a good voice but no personality

Sarah (8:52:49 PM): like... um... jordin

8:54 - Boo. Yay! Only one more day and I'm completely free for the summer! Also, I hate Randy.
8:55 - And Paula. No you weren't Simon! SHE SUCKS. The fact that that song was written in a style that would help Jordin ticks me off.

Sarah (8:55:21 PM): let's look at jordin's parents

Sarah (8:55:25 PM): oh, her dad is famous?

Sarah (8:55:28 PM): i didn't know

Sarah (8:55:32 PM): she's not 17, is she?

Sarah (8:55:41 PM): surprise!

Sarah (8:55:51 PM): it is NOT! it's a popularity contest with singing!

Sarah (8:55:57 PM): i refuse to believe your lies

Sarah (8:56:05 PM): it is not a singing competition

Sarah (8:56:21 PM): i don't want to download your garbage!
Sarah (8:57:07 PM): jordin is your american idol

Sarah (8:57:17 PM): blake needs to do something good tomorrow night
Sarah (8:57:25 PM): to start off his fancy noo careerz

Sarah (8:57:31 PM): as AI #2

Jerks

2007-05-15T23:51:00.000-04:00

Dear Chris Pronger,

I don't know how you got away with receiving no penalty minutes for your hit on Tomas Holmstrom, but you better believe I'll be watching you very carefully and I hope the league gets on you.

Dear Rob Niedermayer,

@#$@%. You're scum. But at least you got penalized. Not nearly enough, but more than Pronger did.

"Liveblogging" American Idol

2007-05-15T20:31:00.000-04:00

Sorry for the delay. Bad weather crapped on the internet, so I have been putting notes on Post-Its.

Jordin Sparks singing "Wishing On A Star," picked by Simon Cowell

8:04 - Eh, okay. I never feel moved when she sings.
8:05 - Stop reminding me that you're a teenager.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #1)

Blake Lewis singing "Roxanne," picked by Paula Abdul

8:10 - Wow. Young mayor.
8:11 - I hate this song. Not as much as "Imagine" though.
8:12 - I like Blake. Not as much as Sarah, though.

Melinda Doolittle singing "I Believe In You and Me," picked by Randy Johnson

8:14 - Stop name dropping, Randy.
8:16 - Test her range!

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #2)

Jordin Sparks singing "She Works Hard For The Money"

8:25 - One of her best.

Blake Lewis singing "This Love"

8:29 - I like this song.
8:30 - Woo Blake! I want to give him a hug!

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #3)

Melinda Doolittle singing "Nutbush City Limits"

8:38 - Good job, didn't know the song, though.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #4)

Jordin Sparks chooses to sing "I Who Have Nothing"

Sarah (8:43:50 PM): so they get to pick the last song?

Sarah (8:43:58 PM): i will be interested to see what blake picks

Sarah (8:44:04 PM): ha ha, star at the bottom of the escalator

Sarah (8:44:11 PM): that's how you know when you've hit it big

8:45 - Pretty good. Still don't like her for some reason.
8:47 - Simon didn't like it! "She's got her star in the mall. She doesn't care anymore," Robin on Jordin.

BLAKE LEWIS AND SIR MIX-A-LOT!

Blake Lewis chooses to sing "When I Get You Alone"

8:50 - Robin Thicke?????? Why are people singing things sung by the son of the dad on "Growing Pains?" That said....I liked it.

Sarah (8:49:38 PM): i like it when he dances

Sarah (8:49:43 PM): his little moonwalk dance

Sarah (8:50:02 PM): blake is robin thicke x 30000000000000

Sarah (8:50:14 PM): by which i mean he's that much better than RT

Sarah (8:50:20 PM): not that he is more RT than RT

Sarah (8:51:05 PM): yay simon

8:55 - Haha. She got a street.

Melinda Doolittle singing "I'm A Woman"

8:56 - Good job.
8:58 - House starts in TWO MINUTES!

Weird

2007-05-15T00:04:00.000-04:00

I was watching TV (Scrubs) and I started thinking about the time a year or so ago when I was watching TV and I saw Dominic Monaghan on a talk show, which I think was "The Tonight Show with Jay Leno." As soon as my show ended, I started flipping channels and landed on "The Tonight Show with Jay Leno." Guest? Dominic Monaghan.

FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAKY.

I think this one would have to go up there with this time or the time that I called that Adam Vinatieri would miss a field goal wide left in the 2007 Super Bowl. Hehheh.

"Liveblogging" American Idol

2007-05-08T20:07:00.000-04:00

8:07 - I pretty much missed Melinda's performance. Luckily, we get TWO songs tonight.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #1)

Blake Lewis singing "You Should Be Dancin'"

8:13 - Hi, Barry Gibb!
8:14 - Blake's outfit looks like a weird military uniform.
8:15 - Whatever, judges, it's the freaking BEE-GEES.

LaKisha Jones singing "Stayin' Live"

8:17 - Barry Gibb can still do the falsetto.
8:18 - I learned the words to this song by watching "Airplane!" with the subtitles on.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #2)

Jordin Sparks singing "To Love Somebody"

8:27 - I personally feel that Clay Aiken put more emotion into this song.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #3)

Melinda Doolittle singing "How Can You Mend A Broken Heart"

8:37 - I liked it.

Blake Lewis singing "This Is Where I Came In"

8:40 - Nice.
8:41 - Shut up, Randy.
8:42 - I want to pat his head.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #4)

8:47 - Hi, Judge Judy!

LaKisha Jones singing "Run To Me"

8:50 - I think I saw Judge Judy swaying. It was good.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #5)

Jordin Sparks singing "Woman In Love"

8:57 - Eh. I guess it's pretty good, but I'm not terribly moved.

CENSORSHIP!

2007-05-05T17:43:00.000-04:00

Sarah: Oh, I'll be home for the Kentucky Derby! Did you know the Queen is going to be there?
Mom: *stunned silence*
Sarah: No, at the Kentucky Derby, not our house.

*later that week*

Mom: The Queen better get here soon. Marie's in her chair!
Sarah: She could sit in that chair.
Alfie: Why? You can't let the Queen sit in the chair you peed in!

Mom: A lot of people have sat in that chair since Sarah peed in it.

More family hijinks

2007-05-05T08:40:00.000-04:00

Alfie: Wow, there are so many horses running in the Kentucky Derby that I think they had to get some new jockeys. I've never heard of some of these guys.
Sarah: What are you doing? How are you so familiar with jockeys? What do you do, scope the sports page for jockeys?
Alfie: No, of course not. I'm not a super model.

Overheard

2007-05-04T22:50:00.000-04:00

Mom (to Srah): You could be Kenny Rogers....if you could grow a beard.

"I just remembered my Charlemagne."

2007-05-03T19:24:00.000-04:00

Marie and I have just decided that we both want to be Sean Connery when we grow up.

The time is currently 1:20AM

2007-05-03T01:20:00.000-04:00

Why am I still awake? Because I was listening to my Wings tie their series 2-2 with a 3-2 OT win! Wooo!

Red Wing goals by Holmstrom, Lang and Schneider! Yay!

"Liveblogging" American Idol

2007-05-01T20:04:00.000-04:00

8:00 - Blah, blah, blah.

Phil Stacey singing "Blaze of Glory"

8:04 - BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. I hope you go home.
8:05 - I keep making the mistake of looking.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #1)

Jordin Sparks singing "Livin' On A Prayer"

8:16 (?) - Eh. But yay, it reminds me of Michigan hockey games.*

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #2)

8:23 - It looked like LaKisha almost swatted Seacrest in the face. That would have been funny.

LaKisha Jones singing "This Ain't A Love Song"

8:25 - Jon Bon Jovi remains good-looking even though he's a jillion years older than me.
8:26 - No one wants to talk to Sarah.
8:28 - Why did Simon and LaKisha just kiss on the lips? What the hell? Flattery is good but kissing Simon is just wrong.
8:30 - Why is Blake's hair brown?

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #3)

Blake Lewis singing "Shot Through The Heart"

8:34 - There have been three votes for the return of beat-boxing.
8:35 - YAY!

Sarah (8:36:16 PM): he can do some impressive things with his mouth

Alfie (8:36:19 PM): HAHA!

Sarah (8:36:23 PM): (that's what she said)

Sarah (8:36:42 PM): he was cringing at the drums

Sarah (8:36:44 PM): it was weird

Sarah (8:36:52 PM): he sort of looks like your hobbit

8:38 - If Paula's imitation of Simon's mom is any good, I'm disturbed for two people. Paula and Simon's mom. Don't "dance" like that.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #4)

Chris Richardson singing "Dead or Alive"

8:45 - I kind of want to watch Ghostbusters. This has nothing to do with his performance. I just do.
8:46 - I kind of liked it. Definitely more than Jordin's slaughtering of "Livin' On A Prayer."
8:47 - Why isn't Seacrest wearing a tie?
8:49 - Nicknames for Phil:

Marie - Stinking Rat
Lock - Nosferatu
Dad - Ben

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #5)

Melinda Doolittle singing "Have A Nice Day"

8:52 - What's with the keyboardist's hair?
8:53 - MORE COWBELL!
8:54 - Pretty good.

Sarah (8:53:54 PM): she's a better "rocker" than jordin

Sarah (8:53:59 PM): jordin didn't have the rock energy

Sarah (8:54:05 PM): she just sang - she didn't "perform"

8:55 - Judges loved it. Reminded them of Tina Turner.
8:57 - Recap time. NO MORE PHIL, EVER.

SEND PHIL HOME! Oh, you need to send two home? Send him home twice.

* I accidentally deleted the whole part about Jordin. Whoops.

"Liveblogging" American Idol

2007-04-24T20:02:00.000-04:00

I believe that the whole "Idol Gives Back" thing would be more believable if I thought Seacrest had a soul. I think he's a robot of some sort.

8:02 - Eh, Bono. I don't know how I feel about this. I'm not the biggest U2 fan. I understand why he was chosen for this episode, though.
8:05 - Oh hell. This is the first of the two song episodes, isn't it?

Chris Richardson singing "Change the World" (Eric Clapton)

8:06 - I love this song. Get off the stool.
8:07 - I actually don't mind the nasally voice. I love Eric Clapton.
8:08 - Is he growing out a beard to look like Eric Clapton? That'd be awesome.
8:09 - Oh, it's two numbers for charity. Never mind.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #1)

Melinda Doolittle singing "There Will Come a Day" (Faith Hill)

8:18 - Awesome as usual.
8:19 - IM from Sarah

Sarah (8:19:46 PM): simon looks like he belongs on the front of a romance novel

Sarah (8:19:48 PM): i wouldn't buy it

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #2)

Blake Lewis singing "Imagine" (John Lennon)

8:25 - DEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATH to you.
8:26 - I hate this song. Just think. I might have voted for you if you had chosen ANY OTHER SONG. This is the song that makes me want to punch the radio any time it comes on.
8:27 - Also, The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald.

Sarah (8:28:21 PM): i was wanting you to do POWER TO THE PEOPLE

Sarah (8:28:34 PM): that one is supposed to inspire people to do stuff

Sarah (8:28:43 PM): instead of just inspiring people to imagine about stuff

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #3)

Sarah (8:30:11 PM): i bet lakisha believes she can fly

Sarah (8:30:20 PM): i bet she believes she can touch the sky
Sarah (8:30:27 PM): i bet she thinks about it every night and day

LaKisha Jones singing "I Believe" (Fantasia)

8:36 - "We got the new Bucky Covington CD!" Bob and Robin, while watching LaKisha's performance.
8:37 - Pretty good.
8:38 - Paula is irritating.
8:39 - Robin feels that she should have serenaded us with "Baby Mama."

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #4)

Phil Stacey singing "Change" (Garth Brooks)

8:44 - ALIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN!

Sarah (8:44:49 PM): there's an alien on the TV

Sarah (8:45:01 PM): someone alert the authorities
Sarah (8:45:15 PM): "the change"?

Sarah 8:45:19 PM): is it about menopause?

Sarah (8:45:57 PM): one of the TV recap sites calls him nosferatu

Sarah (8:46:08 PM): i would like to see him in a big cape

Sarah (8:46:18 PM): even better, i'd like to not see him at all

Sarah (8:46:20 PM): that would be awesome

8:47 - I didn't look at the TV, so it wasn't as atrocious as it could have been.

Sarah (8:48:50 PM): FALSE

Sarah (8:48:53 PM): NO ONE LIKES YOU

Sarah (8:49:00 PM): especially not your baby daughter

Sarah (8:49:05 PM): who will grow up hating you

Sarah (8:49:13 PM): because you chose a stupid reality TV show over her

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #5)

8:53 - "I've never met nice people before!" Simon, on America's First Harvest

Jordin Sparks singing "You'll Never Walk Alone" (Rodgers and Hammerstein)

Sarah (8:55:13 PM): i hate carousel

8:56 - Pretty good.

Sarah (8:56:49 PM): if she had to sing something from a musical, she should have sung climb every mountain

Sarah (8:56:56 PM): or the lonely goatherd

Sarah (8:57:00 PM): that inspires me

Sarah (8:57:08 PM): to be a goatherd

Sarah (8:57:17 PM): i think i would have sung this in a different key

Sarah (8:57:30 PM): well, I would have sung this in a VERY different key

Sarah (8:57:42 PM): because i am a terrible terrible singer who dogs and family members hate

Sarah (8:57:50 PM): and i have a range of about five notes

Sarah (8:58:05 PM): that was not as great as randy thinks

Sarah (8:58:12 PM): maybe that's my carousel-prejudice talking

8:59 - "How do we vote for Sanjaya?" Robin, missing her favorite Idol

Because I'm a Packers fan....

2007-04-24T13:01:00.000-04:00

Take him! First round! Second pick! NFL Draft! Think how pretty he'd look in Honolulu blue and silver!!!!!

Strange....

2007-04-21T18:57:00.000-04:00

He* doesn't look like a scum-sucking lowlife thug. But he is.

He better hope that Mikka Kiprusoff doesn't need to come out of Game 6.

Also, if you were a 30-year old forward known for your finisse**, would YOU pick a fight with a 45-year old known for being in freakishly good shape***?

I know I wouldn't.

* Jamie McLennan
** Jarome Iginla
*** Chris Chelios

"Liveblogging" American Idol

2007-04-17T20:00:00.000-04:00

8:01 - I am not a country music fan.
8:02 - Martina McBride is teaching. I don't know much of her music.
8:03 - I hope Sanjaya has a bouffant this week.

Phil Stacey sings "Where The Blacktop Ends"

8:03 - Somewhere, my sister is screaming and hiding her face.
8:05 - Guess who still doesn't like Phil or most country music! Me!
8:06 - Judges liked it. I want pizza. I can't watch this show on an empty stomach.
8:07 - "This is my genre," Phil on country music.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #1)

Jordin Sparks sings "Broken Wing"

8:12 - I hate it when people sing songs originally done by the guest mentor. This was especially annoying during "Gwen Stefani" week.
8:14 - Pretty good.
8:15 - Simon said that she could win American Idol based on her performance.
8:16 - I love how tiny Seacrest looks next to her.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #2)

8:21 - GO AWAY, CONSTANTINE!

Sanjaya Malakar sings "Something To Talk About"

8:22 - I like that song, don't you dare ruin it.
8:23 - If you were going to sing a song originally done by a woman, why couldn't it be "Redneck Woman?"
8:24 - My ears are bleeding.
8:26 - Simon thought it was hideous.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #3)

LaKisha Jones sings "Jesus, Take The Wheel"

8:32 - "She'll tear it up, Flint's a little bit country," Bob on LaKisha.

Chris Richardson sings "Mayberry"

8:38 - I still want you to stay longer than Phil Stacey. I HATE PHIL!

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #4)

8:46 - Robin is talking about the yakuza.

Melinda Doolittle sings "Trouble Is A Woman"

8:47 - That hairstyle makes her look younger.
8:49 - Judges loved it.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK #5)

Blake Lewis sings "When The Stars Go Blue"

8:55 - Big shock, Blake is wearing plaid. And I got an IM asking if he was singing in English. Thanks, Sarah.
8:56 - I wish he had added beat-boxing. That song was boring.
8:57 - "Poor song choice. He should've done "This Kiss" by Faith Hill with beat-boxing. Because that's the only country song I can think of. Someone should have done Harper Valley PTA. That's an awesome song. Beat-boxing wouldn't have worked with that though," Sarah on Blake's performance.
9:00 - Now everyone is singing "Convoy." I hate you all.

Mamma Mia!

2007-04-17T19:40:00.000-04:00

As you may have heard, Mamma Mia! is coming to the big screen! If you like ABBA, this is good news. If you are my father or godfather, this is terrifying news because the women in your life will probably drag you to see it in the cinema, just like they did in the theater.

This is not what has me so excited. The fact that Meryl Streep, Pierce Brosnan and Amanda Seyfried are in it is not the exciting thing either. The exciting thing is that there are rumors of the casting of the father of Sweden's Sexiest Man 1999 and Mr. Darcy as Bill and Harry!

Oh crap. That means they sing.

I'm playing around with new features....

2007-04-17T16:22:00.000-04:00

I'm currently having some issues with my comments, etc. I will hopefully have all of these problems fixed tomorrow. I should be blogging about American Idol amongst other things as well, so I will work on comments, formatting, what have you, tonight some time.

On tonight's American Idol

2007-04-17T13:52:00.000-04:00

If Sanjaya Malakar sings "Redneck Woman," I will give my sister $20. Seriously. It would totally be worth it.

"Liveblogging" American Idol

2007-04-10T20:05:00.000-04:00

8:03 - I hate Jennifer Lopez.

Melinda Doolittle singing "Sway"

8:04 - Yay Melinda.
8:08 - Haha, Simon. "I think he wanted to say something bad and he finally got the chance."

LaKisha Jones singing "Conga"

8:14 - Why are we starting with the two most talented people?
8:16 - Shut up, Paula. Safe this. *makes imaginary rude gesture*
8:17 - Yes, we get it. Tension between Ryan and Simon. Enough already! Time for Sanjaya to sing "She Bangs" à la William Hung.

Chris Richardson singing "Smooth"

8:24 - Please stay longer than Glen. Glen and Haley must go.

Haley Scarnato singing "Turn the Beat Around"

8:30 - I don't hate Jennifer Lopez as much now.
8:31 - "Is she like seven feet tall?" Bob, on Haley. "She's like the female Sanjaya!" Lock, on Haley.
8:33 - Simon is telling you that you're tarting it up. I am telling you your hair looks stupid.

Phil "Glen" Stacey singing "Maria, Maria"

8:34 - Quoting A League of Their Own to Mom. Nice hat, creepy. GO AWAY. YOU PLAY A ROLE IN CURRENT NIGHTMARES.
8:38 - "Does "Lowrider" count as a Latin song? I want Blake to sing that," Sarah's favorite is upcoming.

Jordin Sparks singing "Rhythm is Gonna Get You"

8:44 - Pretty good.
8:45 - Apparently Lock and Bob will be performing at Art Fair. Ick on many levels.

Blake Lewis singing "I Need To Know"

8:47 - "JLo hates Marc Anthony. Blake was singing and she was glaring at him. Like "Stop singing that. You remind me of that guy who's always in my house," Sarah on Jennifer Lopez's reaction to Blake's song.

Sanjaya Malakar singing "Bésame Mucho"

8:54 - "He's trying to be Zorro," Robin on Sanjaya.
8:55 - Why are you not singing "She Bangs?" You are dead to me.
8:56 - Randy and Paula are surprised because they liked it. So am I.
8:57 - "I hate myself for this, but it wasn't horrible," Simon on Sanjaya.

Send Glen and Haley home, America!!!!!!!! DO IT!

Woooooooooooooo!

2007-04-05T21:33:00.000-04:00

SPRING BREAK!

While out with the parents

2007-04-04T01:40:00.000-04:00

Cashier who appeared to be about 30: The total is $19.84.
Me: Heehee. Good year!
Mom: Very good year.
Cashier: That's the year Van Halen released (some album).
Me: Really? Huh. Twenty-three years ago....
Cashier: Yeah, I was born in 1985, so that makes me feel old.

Somehow I didn't scream.

Watching Leno

2007-04-04T00:15:00.000-04:00

Nice accent, gorgeous smile, beautiful eyes, rather funny. What's not to love?

"Liveblogging" American Idol

2007-04-03T20:01:00.000-04:00

8:01 - I wish I was more interested in Tony Bennett. If it's LEGENDS WEEK, does that mean Bobby Darin is a possibility? It better. Unless Sanjaya tries to sing it.
8:02 - "He looks so terrible! How can they like him?" - Marie, on Sanjaya (I thought she was talking about Tony Bennett.)

(Blake Lewis sings "Mack the Knife")

8:03 - BLAKE IS SINGING BOBBY!!!! Or Louis Armstrong, but I choose to believe BOBBY!
8:04 - I hate your pants. But I think I love you.
8:05 - "He's such a terrible singer but I love him." - Sarah, on Blake Lewis
8:06 - "What is her alcohol level?" - Marie, on Paula

*COMMERCIAL BREAK #1*

(Phil Stacey sings "Night and Day")

8:12 - "I accidentally looked at the TV." - Sarah, on Phil "Glen" Stacey
8:13 - "Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz." - Sarah, on Phil again.
8:14 - He's trying too hard. It's not impressing me.
8:15 - I think I have the same teeth as him.
8:17 - Well, Diana Ross, Lulu and Gwen Stefani all thought she was impressive; apparently she is more impressed by Tony Bennett.

(Melinda Doolittle sings "I Got Rhythm")

8:19 - Yay! Melinda is good.
8:20 - Shut up, Paula.

*COMMERCIAL BREAK #2*

(Chris Richardson sings "Don't Get Around Much Anymore")

8:27 - Why wear suspenders if you aren't going to use them? Also, you're wearing a belt.
8:29 - I'll keep you if it means Sanjaya goes. Also, what on Earth will Sanjaya do this week.

(Jordin Sparks sings "On A Clear Day")

8:32 - She was pretty good. Seriously, shut up, Paula.
8:33 - "I hope Sanjaya comes out with a bald cap on. Not even with his head shaved. Just wearing a bald cap for no reason. And refuses to explain it. That would rule." - Sarah, on Sanjaya's hair change-a-week.
8:37 - "He sucks but he can't even suck as much as I want him to." - Sarah, on Sanjaya again.

(Gina Glocksen sings "Smile")

8:38 - I did not know this was by Charlie Chaplin.

(Sanjaya Malakar sings "Dancing Cheek to Cheek")

8:41 - "He comes up with something interesting every week." - Tony Bennett, on Sanjaya
8:42 - "Heaven, I'm in Heaven..." - Sanjaya; "Hell, I'm in Hell...." - Me, on his performance.
8:43 - I don't think much of Fred Astaire's singing, but I would like him to sing that song over and over to get this out of my head.
8:43 - "I can't even comment on the singing." - Randy, on Sanjaya's performance
8:44 - "Thank you for the dance." - Paula, on Sanjaya's performance

*Another commercial, I lost count*

8:49 - "That was a Sarah hello." - Marie, on Haley's hello.

(Haley Scarnato sings "Ain't Misbehavin'")

8:50 - "I like that she's wearing the lower half of a mermaid costume as a top." - Robin, on Haley's outfit
8:52 - Yet another case of avoiding giving feedback.

*Another freaking commercial*

8:56 - Why is Ryan hugging the man Mom says is Sanjaya's father?

(LaKisha Jones sings "Stormy Weather")

8:57 - I like LaKisha. She's good. I want a cookie.
8:59 - Shut up, Paula. Let's watch House, M.D. instead.

Yay!

2007-04-01T21:13:00.000-04:00

I'm watching Sherlock Holmes and the Case of the Silk Stocking. I started giggling when Inspector Lestrade appeared. Yay for him!

Directorial ambitions

2007-04-01T17:47:00.000-04:00

I'm going to direct a production of Yeoman of the Guard in which Colonel Fairfax doesn't get the girl.

Overheard

2007-04-01T00:30:00.000-04:00

Mom: I do not want to turn around and see you looking excited about Wrestlemania 23.
(turns)
Mom: *groans*

Please please me

2007-03-31T21:51:00.000-04:00

I really hope that the NCAA Basketball Championship does not end up being Florida-Ohio State. That would kind of irritate me.*

* By kind of, I mean I would be about ready to vomit.

Things I have heard on the radio today that have made me want to smack it with a hammer:

2007-03-30T13:11:00.000-04:00

* Joe Buck referring to his "velvety smooth" voice. Stupid Cardinals homer.
* Colin Cowherd talking about mojitos. Who honestly cares? I listen to mock your sports "information" not your drinking preferences. Although I guess I can start doing that too.

While watching "Manos: The Hands of Fate"

2007-03-30T13:05:00.000-04:00

Did you ever notice that the male "teenager" in the film appears to be wearing a wedding ring?

Whoops

2007-03-29T23:49:00.000-04:00

I just realized that I haven't blogged in several months. I missed my fifth blogiversary. I haven't even made any sarcastic posts about American Idol. Shocking. I'll try to start blogging again.

While watching ND-USC football

2006-11-25T21:26:00.000-05:00

Dear Brent Musberger,

Shut up. You are obnoxious. You drive me nuts. SHUT UP!

Alfie

Hmph

2006-11-16T20:29:00.000-05:00

Sometimes I wish I could turn off my ears:

(while watching TV)
Mom: That's where we should have sent Alfie.
Dad: You mean to a boy's school?
Mom: Not just a boy's school - a Jesuit boy's school.

Hmph. Thanks a lot Mom and Dad.

And another

2006-10-26T23:27:00.000-04:00

Dear Scott Rolen,

I hate you. Strike out.

How the heck was that Brandon Inge's fault?

Confusedly,
Alfie

P.S. I HATE YOU.

Yet another baseball letter

2006-10-26T23:26:00.000-04:00

Dear Joe Buck,

Seriously, shut up. You are an idiot. Shut up.

A diehard Tigers fan,
Alfie

P.S. One of us knows what irony is and it isn't you, so stop talking about things being ironic.

Argh

2006-10-05T14:05:00.000-04:00

Dear Johnny Damon,

Ahem. When you took off your helmet today, you appeared to have some blond highlights. Ew. Neanderthal to metrosexual? How 'bout no.

Ick,

Alfie

Ahem

2006-10-05T13:40:00.000-04:00

Dear Jason Giambi,

Thank you for being the most amusing member of the New York Yankees baseball team. While the organization seems to have had luck making Johnny Damon not look like a neanderthal, they seem to have had no effect on you.

Your hair is kind of scraggly looking and my oh my, your uniform looked like pyjamas. Your teammates appear to wear belts, making their uniforms look like uniforms. You look like you're wearing some freakin' ugly pinstripe PJs. One can only hope they have footies.

A diehard Tigers fan,

Alfie

Game 2, 1st Inning

2006-10-05T13:39:00.000-04:00

Bases loaded, Verlander strikes out ARod.

HAHA!

Go Tigers!!!

2006-10-05T13:17:00.000-04:00

Beat those damn Yankees!

"I'm a genius, not an engineer...."

2006-09-19T23:25:00.000-04:00

Happy Birthday to an actor whose presence in films always makes me enjoy them more!

Oh dear....

2006-07-28T14:39:00.000-04:00

I'd forgotten that I share a birthday with her.

Oh no. And him.

Hippo Birdy to me!

2006-07-28T13:28:00.000-04:00

One year til I can rhyme that with my age....

I <3 Neville

2006-07-28T13:25:00.000-04:00

I was watching Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban today and I think I've discovered the reason why I love Neville so much. During the scene where Harry, Ron and all of the other boys in the Third Year dorm are sitting around eating magic candy, Neville is wearing pyjamas, like all the rest, but he's also wearing a sweater vest and suspenders.

So loveably nerdy.

Whatever, she likes Thomas Ian Nicholas

2006-07-08T17:12:00.000-04:00

As Sarah is back for the family viewing of 1776, I feel it is time to come clean.

When I was younger, about six, I had crushes on these two men: this one and this one*.

I tell you this so that Sarah can never use them as ammunition against me.

* He likes American History and one of his favorite movies is a Bond film.....heehee.

I must only use my powers for good

2006-07-06T09:27:00.000-04:00

I am totally freaking psychic. I was wandering around this morning, thinking about the movie Slap Shot and the song from the film, "Right Back Where We Started From." This in itself is not the awesome part. The awesome part is that less than two minutes later, the song came on the radio.

I suppose if I am doomed to having boring and sucktastic dreams, being psychic will ease my pain.

I bet Sarah's glad she doesn't live at home anymore

2006-06-08T22:34:00.000-04:00

I was watching the Detroit Tigers-Chicago White Sox game tonight and the commentators mentioned Mike Scioscia. As I am both a baseball and Simpsons fan, I felt it necessary to try and discover what happened to Mr. Burns's Dream Team from the episode "Homer at the Bat."

In the episode, the players were as follows:

Pitcher: Roger Clemens (hypnotised to think he's a chicken) - currently playing in the minor leagues
Catcher: Mike Scioscia (suffered radiation poisoning) - has been the manager of the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim
First Baseman: Don Mattingly (kicked off the team because Mr. Burns did not know what sideburns were) - Now the hitting coach for the New York Yankees, no longer has a moustache, appears not to have sideburns
Second Baseman: Steve Sax (sentenced to six life sentences for every unnsolved murder in New York City) - now a financial consultant in California
Shortstop: Ozzie Smith (fell into the Mystery Spot) - inducted into Cooperstown in 2002, son Nikko was a contestant on American Idol
Third Baseman: Wade Boggs (unconscious on the floor of Moe's Bar after a fight with Barney Gumble over the greatest English Prime Minister; Boggs favored Pitt the Elder, Barney favored Lord Palmerston) - now a high school baseball coach in Florida
Right Field: Darryl Strawberry (played most of the game but was taken out so Homer could pinch hit) - arrests, divorce, etc.
Center Field: Ken Griffey Jr. (overdosed on nerve tonic, causing gigantisism) - actually still in the Major Leagues, playing for the Cincinnati Reds
Left Field: Jose Canseco (missed the game trying to save a baby, pets, household appliances, etc. from a burning house) - admitted to using steroids, implicated many teammates, no longer in Major League Baseball

I watched The Simpsons after the game. I was kind of hoping it would be this episode. It wasn't. Now I'm sad. :(

Reasons why I almost peed my pants during "The DaVinci Code"

2006-05-22T00:19:00.000-04:00

#1 - There was a preview for the new James Bond movie. *snort*
#2 - As the child of archivists, every time they touched ancient documents I screamed a little inside.
#3 - The characters were very different than I expected them to be, so I kept expecting stuff to happen and it didn't.
#4 - Scenes in Scotland = Happy me!

Also, I just really had to pee. Don't buy large drinks during long movies.

Fun times in the nerdiest family alive

2006-05-21T13:40:00.000-04:00

Alfiedad: So, your shirt says "Singing in the rain" on it?
Me: Yeah, or "Bringing the pain."
Alfiedad: Singing in the rain.
Me: Yeah, and that's Lina Lamont on the back.
Alfiemom: Or Death.

Me: So this one time I was trapped in a closet with Alex and his ex-roommate and Alex was trying to feel Rob up.
(Family looks at me strangely)
Me: You know, the closet that moves between floors.
Alfiemom: You mean an elevator?

I don't know what's sadder....

2006-05-18T16:58:00.000-04:00

....that Neil Diamond is on MySpace, or that my sister is friends with him.

NERD.

The time is currently 2:58PM

2006-05-18T15:01:00.000-04:00

Accordingly to a breaking news story, they are searching for Jimmy Hoffa.

How is this breaking news? They've been looking for him since 1975. Nothing short of actually finding the man really counts as news. Announcing that you're going to demolish a building because you think you've found him is not breaking news. It has not been breaking news any of the times you've announced that there is a new suspected place where his body was hidden that you are going to examine.

Seriously, please find him this time. I'm sick of the "news."

I also dislike Elvis!

2006-05-09T20:08:00.000-04:00

Ok, here we go!

First up, Taylor Hicks singing "Jailhouse Rock." Oh dear. When he dances, he looks like a Sim fighting the urge to pee. The singing was okay, the song choice sucked. I love Simon - he hated it!

Oh crap - there are only four. Does that mean they each sing MORE THAN ONE ELVIS SONG?!?!?!? For the love of God, please no.

Up next, Chris Daughtry singing "Suspicious Minds." Hey Sarah! He's going to fuelerize your song! What's up with that jacket? Hey Randy, I think I want a dog named Chris! I guess it was pretty good. I was distracted by the sunglasses.

Third, Elliott Yamin singing "I Can Dream." I don't even know if I got the title right. I've never heard this song. I have a soft spot for Elliott. I think it's because he tends to come off as a bit of a nerd. YAY! Simon like it! A LOT!

Preview for tonight's House - Chase and House, both so cute!

Final singer of the first half, Katharine McPhee singing "Hound Dog" and "All Shook Up." Yay! I hate both songs! If we dump her this week, we can have all guys next week! Yay! You might want to get that itch checked out.... BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I want you and Taylor to leave. I think Paula's on drugs. I <3 Simon!

Beginnning Round 2, Taylor Hicks singing "In the Ghetto." Oh, for the love of God. Haha, Tommy Mattola told you not to dance! I can't listen to this song without doing my Cartman impression. That is not constructive criticism, Randy, that is flattery. Simon, stop using Paula's drugs - that sucked!

Here comes Chris Daughtry singing "A Little Less Conversation." So far Sarah's predictions are okay. Maybe Elliott and Katharine will sing "Kentucky Rain" and "Always On My Mind." I wish Chris was wearing a sparkly jumpsuit and sky diving in Vegas. What was with the screaming at the end? You sounded like you had a hairball. Paula looked like she was going to pop her head off.

So why is Seacrest wearing a three piece suit? Is he trying to steal my sister from apete?

Time for Elliott Yamin singing "Trouble." Elliott, please don't dance. Yay! They like you! Yay! Simon wants you to go to the next round!

Last, it's Katharine McPhee singing "Can't Help Falling in Love." Guess "Suspicious Minds" is the only Sarah song we shall here tonight! She just started and I am already dreaming of the end. Stop looking longingly at the camera! PITCHY! SUCKY! I hope they send you home tomorrow!

Happy Birthday!

2006-05-06T10:42:00.000-04:00

Happy incredibly belated fourth birthday to my blog! Oops. Sitting around on May 6th, realizing the anniversary of your blog was in early January.

Shut up!

2006-04-25T17:28:00.000-04:00

I may or may not have watched this twice in the last two days.

It was "scrumtralescent."

2006-04-23T11:27:00.000-04:00

At the request of Cheryl, I have finally decided to blog about The Cutting Edge: Going for the Gold.

This is the greatest movie ever. Nothing about this movie sucked at all. It was maaaaaaahvelous.

*crickets*

Ok, that was a lie.

I knew this movie was going to suck before I watched it and I was not disappointed. The sucking began when the movie started at a skating competition, in which the star's father was doing the play-by-play with Oksana Baiul. The sucking continued with the sniping between the male and female leads - it was cute and well done in the original film, now it's just stupid and poorly written.

I did laugh when the male lead was learning how to skate (yeah, he had never been on ice skates before) and the five year old girls in his skating class were shouting "Toe-pick!" at him. I wanted to hit the female lead when she did the same.

Also, the male lead being able to go from not ever skating to being an Olympic calibre skater within three months - not going to happen.

Apparently, Kate and Doug DID win the gold medal - there was a crappily Photoshopped picture of them that appeared to be from the 60s, 70s, or 80s, definitely not 1992 in Albertville.

IT SUCKED SO BAD and the female lead was the most painful part.

hint

2006-04-23T11:24:00.000-04:00

*cough* Look what's out on DVD! *cough*

WE NEED OUT!

2006-04-23T11:14:00.000-04:00

My friend Meggels and I are beginning to get fed up with certain aspects of our school. One of our ways of dealing with this is to create drinking games that we will never use, to entertain ourselves and keep us sane. We created one together for the one class we have together, but I've gone on and created one for two of my other classes:

Meggels & Alfie's Drinking Game:

Everytime the girl behind us brings her religion into the conversation - take a shot (True, it is a religion class, but this has been known to happen at least three times an hour and never has any bearing on the class, she just likes to remind us that she's the only person of that particular religion in the class.).
Everytime the phone belonging to the same girl goes off in class - take 3 shots.

Alfie's Drinking Game for her first class:

Everytime a certain girl tries to show off her lack of knowledge about State Compact Theory - take a shot.
Everytime the professor asks me about the news in our school newspaper - take a shot and give him one too, because anyone who thinks that paper actually contains "news" requires some alcohol fast.

Alfie's Drinking Game for the other class:

Everytime a certain person sticks their feet on my chair - take 5 shots (This would not be a problem if she puts her feet on the rails underneath, but no, she has been known to kick me in the butt and put her dirty shoes all over my coat.).
Everytime the same girl says something and sounds like an idiot - take a shot (You'll be buzzed within five minutes and dead by the end of class.).

Not that you're cheap or anything

2006-04-23T11:10:00.000-04:00

Dear My School,

I have somehow gotten the idea that you are trying to save money at my expense. I can't imagine where this idea has come from.

Our graduation speaker was going to be at graduation anyway - his son's graduating.
You fired my mentor because "Eh, we don't need him."
You have changed the toilet paper in public bathrooms on this campus - I personally buy two ply, but I never had a big problem with your 1-ply paper.....however, this 1/2-ply stuff has got to stop.

Look at my arm!

2006-04-21T07:43:00.000-04:00

Look at my arm!
Originally uploaded by qbqrat.

I went and gave blood yesterday. Apparently, my blood was coming out pretty easily, because I was done in about eight minutes and they needed a pressure wrap to stop the flow.

Several hours later, when I took the pressure bandage off, this is what my arm looked like. That's not dried blood, that's the bruise.

Six weird things about me

2006-04-18T21:03:00.000-04:00

I've been tagged with this meme by Sarah.

I can go through an entire pack of Tic Tacs in a day.
My car's name is Ciarán. I named it after Ciarán Hinds after seeing him in Persuasion. While partial to Mr. Darcy, there's also something about Captain Wentworth. I also liked him in The Phantom of the Opera.
I can't sleep in a room with an analog clock. The ticking will drive me crazy.
I'm good at making banana bread. It's pretty much the only baked good I can make from scratch.
I felt ill at the sight of blood until I was almost twelve years old. Given my major, it's a good thing I got over it.
I never skipped a class until the first semester of my senior year of college, when I skipped my 9am class because I didn't get back from seeing Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire until 4am.

I hereby tag anyone who wants to do this - it doesn't matter to me.

While watching American Idol....

2006-04-18T20:31:00.000-04:00

Chris - What a Wonderful World: Pretty and the judges like it.
Paris - Wasn't listening, but the judges liked it.
Taylor - You Send Me: Yay! I like, judges like!

Is Simon drunk? Normally I ignore things Seacrest says, but I've never seen him be positive about three people in a row.

Heehee - Rod Stewart!

Elliott - It Had to be You: Yay! Hurray for Idols singing music I know! Well, the male ones. "Like Michael Buble with more soul....." - Paula's on crack. Yay! Simon's back, even though I liked Elliott!

This season is full of nerds. That makes me happy.

I think Kellie is a ditz. And Rod Stewart interacting with her creeps me out.

Kellie - Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered: Ow! Bad note! Go home! Paula - this is not a fashion competition, it's for the SINGING (and personality). Zero for three! Haha! No one really liked it!

TRAINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN! Luckily it's a commercial break because living next to train tracks is a pain.

Ace - That's All: Um, what is with your hair? It appears to be both slicked back and in a ponytail. It looks strange with the suit. Ew, need to listen to the Kevin Spacey and Bobby Darin versions to get this performance out of my head. It's supposed to be upbeat! Apparently all the judges are on drugs because they liked it.

Apparently Seacrest is 5'7". Which would make him - yes, that's right! Seven inches taller than me! Hahaha!

Katharine - Someone to Watch Over Me: Ack! Painful to my ears. Any song I hear where I feel I could do a better performance = bad performance by the Idol. Owowowowowowowowowowowowowow. All of the judges are dumb.